July 27, 2020
In this episode of the More Than Marriage Podcast, Cody and I are allowing you into a candid and honest conversation that we call a “marriage check in.” We took a week off the podcast in order to give ourselves time to rest and reconnect, because we had been feeling distant and disconnected from one another. Cody and I hope this episode can be a guide for you and your partner as you navigate real and honest conversations!
What is a Marriage Check In and Why Do We Use Them?
C:Andrea, we are two different people with two different lives, right?! Would you say that you know most of what’s going on in my life every day?
A: Nope. It’s incredible how different our days are from one another’s, and some days it’s very obvious that something didn’t go well for you at work or that something is on your mind, but not always.
C: Yeah, same for you. It’s funny how often one of us will greet the other with a joke or silliness when we both get home from work and the other is not having it. We have let that cause frustration between us in the past, but over time we’ve learned to support one another when we’re not on the same page emotionally.
A: Yeah, that’s more of an every-day type situation we run into where checking in with one another is very helpful. There’s another situation we found ourselves in recently that warranted a good deep check-in. That was our wild schedules catching up with us. I had been going to work out classes in the mornings or evenings without much notice, you had miscellaneous chores to take care of that took up a lot of time in the evenings, and we both had separate travels that all seemed to hit at the same time and we were in two totally different mental situations.
C: Because of all of this, we really value checking in with one another. When we check in about more than just the superficial details of our days, we learn how we can better serve one another. Andrea and I value regular deep conversations. When we really get down to the honest feelings and thoughts we are having, we know how to respond in a more loving way. Most importantly, it gives us clear examples of how we can serve each other better in our marriage.
Andrea and I believe that marriage truly is about serving one another. Sometimes in marriage, serving one another is beneficial for the both of you and you both get to enjoy it! However, most of the time when we serve one another we are choosing to meet the other person where they are at, with all their baggage and this involves sacrifice.
Because we found that lately we have been feeeling disconnected from one another, we thought it would be beneficial to do a check in that was more broad than our daily check-ins of “How are you doing/ how was work today/ what did you do today?” Join us today as we allow you to see what a real-time check in conversation could look like for you and your partner.
What Does a Real Marriage Check In Sound Like?
A: Cody and I have pretty constant check ins with one another that happen almost daily. Yet, that doesn’t mean that we always feel connected and understood by one another. We decided to record a more broad and deep check in today. Our hope is that you can use this simple set of two questions to understand your partner in a variety of ways!
Our check in today is simple! We are going to ask the same two questions of each other in regards to multiple topics/themes of our lives. The questions are: “What is going well/ what are you proud of?” and “What has been difficult or has been a struggle?” The topics that we chose to touch on in this check in were: personal lives, relationally, jobs, podcast, and our business. Be sure to tune in more to understand how we take our responses to the next step and discuss how they can help us serve one another better.
Help Us Out!
If you tuned in, we would LOVE for you to leave us a review. Here is the link where you can do that! Simply scroll to where it says “Ratings & Reviews” and click Write a Review. Cody and I would be so grateful if you were to spend a few minutes writing us a review- this helps other people find our podcast! Thanks for listening, and we can’t wait to see you next week!
If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to check out all of our episodes here!